There’s a specific kind of person who always asks how you’re doing but somehow never gets asked back, and it isn’t because they hide it well. It’s that they’ve become so associated with being the checker-inner that unprompted care has started to feel like something that happens to other people
The chronic checker-inner isn't hiding their needs well. They've simply become so identified with the role of reaching out that unprompted care has started to feel like something that happens to other people. A look at how emotional labor calcifies into identity, and what actuall…